Child abuse is a topic that causes rage in many discussions throughout he county because it is outrageous actions against innocent children. Many parents question whether discipline can become child abuse. In the essay “Justice: Childhood Love Lessons” the author, Bell Hooks, shows how love should occur all around one’s household and claims that, “No one can rightfully claim to be loving when behaving abusively” (Hooks, 1 1). To an extent, that is true. However, in my opinion, maintain that this assertion can be right or wrong, depends on how people perceive about love and punishment.
Bell Hooks is an educated woman, feminist, and writer who has dedicated her life to teaching people about civil rights that every human being deserves. She wrote an essay in which she addresses her personal view on the way children should not be hit under any circumstances, because it neglects love; according to her, love and abuse cannot coexist. However, it is unfair to claim that a slap on the hand is considered abuse, and that if parents commit this type of action, they do not love their child.
There is a huge difference between physical punishment and child abuse. A child needs to learn right from wrong, and when the child’s actions turn out of control, it s acceptable to pk or hit them in the hand. As long as the hitting stays to a minimum degree, physical punishment is not child abuse. Sometimes, the parents may unintentionally abuse their child because of teaching their parents taught them. They claim to be “loving’ while carrying out punishment, and that would absolutely confuse a child on what love and abuse is.
To educate a child, sometimes the punishment is necessary, but the extent of violence carried out to supply the discipline can be considered as abusive. Those physical acts are carried out, such as hitting, slapping, or pinching, cannot be called a “loving action. When kids were whipped and told that these punishments were ‘for their own good,” or “parents are doing this because they love their children,” would definitely be misunderstood when they are told they are being whipped because they are being loved.
It is manipulative and sends the wrong message to the children. According to Hooks, “There is nothing that creates more confusions about love in the minds and hearts of children that unkind and/or cruel punishment meted out by the adults they have been taught they should love and respect. ” (Hooks, 1) The mindsets for the kids are overlooked in a caddish way. Their approach would be like, “Oh, I can hit everyone whenever want”, which this shows the child growing up to be an overall abusive kid living over her or his childhood actions.
Overall, there kids perceptions would be the same and think it is alright to do the something and hit anyone at anytime they want. The parents are messing up their child’s childhood of learning from right to wrong. In fact, pking a child the first time shows an overall lesson so that the next time they will think about actions before they act. In some way, kids are still kids, they make mistakes and learn from it which shows them not to CT it up again. Continue on pking them anytime whenever they do something wrong would leave wounded not only on their bodies but also in their hearts and minds.
As young children to becoming young adults, Thai concept would stick with them forever and travel with them when they become older and have kids of their own, and this is not a good example to leave on their kids. Loving is supposed to be a good feeling that brings warmth and security to the heart and reminds of wonderful things. If a boy hitting his girlfriend but telling her that he is hitting her because he loves her, he girlfriend would feel uncertain because loving is supposed to be sweet and wonderful, not hurtful-As the same point, it is wrong to tell a child that they are being loved when they are being abused or punished.
Claiming to be “loving’ while being abusive is as bad as telling someone that you love them, and then pushing them off a cliff to their death. “No one can rightfully claim to be loving when behaving abusively/’ (Hooks, 1). In this statement, Hooks declared that if a parent is hitting their child, then they are showing no love towards the child. In somehow, disagree with Hooks because she uses the word abuse in such a negative form throughout her whole essay. What exactly does “behaving abusively’ mean?
If a person sees the words, “behaving abusively’ the person might be thinking a child was hit in the face and now the child has a black eye, which is abuse. However, Hooks takes the definition of “behaving abusively’ as any type of hitting even if it’s the least amount of pain like a slap on the hand, which is not abuse. It is natural for a parent to punish there children in one way or another during their childhood. Children are naughty and naturally misbehave, and they Anton help it because they are learning what is appropriate and inappropriate.
In other words punishment of any kind, let it be pinching, flicking or pking will result in disorientation in a child’s mind. This statement is true to some people, false to others, but overall hooks tends to be bias in her argument. She doesn’t explore the different variations of physical punishment and how these punishments affect the child’s thought about love. There are many different types Of punishment out there in this cruel world, but not all of them can disorientate a child’s mind or heart about eve.
Simple physical punishments; such as pinching, flicking, and pking, are carried out on us at a very young age, and all throughout life. Our parents are here to discipline us, to teach us the difference of right and wrong. When we first misbehave, our parents might tell us to “knock it off’ or “stop” and they may raise their voice when asserting these commands. We sometimes stop when told to, but sometimes we ignore their commands and keep misbehaving repeatedly. This is where physical punishment comes into play. A form of physical punishment would and will be carried out on us.
At first it may be a simple punishment, but gradually the punishments intensify. Once a punishment has been carried out, many of us become cloaked in fear of punishment and from this fear we learn not to do that mistake again. Simple punishment is used for the good of children and to discipline them, “Dry. David Safari, father five and grandfather of five, CNN asked him to talk to us about his views on pking. He said he was pked as a child, pked his own children when necessary and believes the occasional use of physical punishment not abuse can be an effective tool for parents. Giddier) Now, not all parents are abusive. Some discipline by pking or punishing them in a form Of a time-out or taking away of a privilege. As long as the punishment does not fit a crime, it is fine to discipline a child. All parents experience a time that they have to punish their children, but it is not because they hate or dislike them, but because the children need to learn and the punishment is carried out to teach them that what they did was wrong. Bell Hooks writes, “Why was harsh punishment a gesture of love? ” (Hooks, 1) Harsh punishment is hundred percent not a gesture of love.
It is a gesture of force in which a parent wants their child to listen to them and behave. Light punishment is a tool of teaching and is carried out of love. Punishment itself is not considered as a gesture of love, but may result because of care, a sub-genre of love. Claiming to be loving while behaving abusively is not correct, and is an ironic statement. Parents often do not know the consequences of confusing their children by using great words that do not belong in a situation such as abuse. And as the result, it will misunderstand the children and make them difficult to overcome in many years later.